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Friday, December 23, 2005

Americans vs Canadians


100 Kisses

Dear Sweetheart:

I can't send my salary this month, so I am sending 100 kisses. You are my sweetheart

Your husband
Allen
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His wife replied back after some days to her husband:

Dearest sweetheart,

Thanks for your 100 kisses, I am sending the expenses details.

1. The Milk man agreed on 2 kisses for one month's milk.
2. The electricity man only agreed after 7 kisses.
3. Your house owner is coming every day and taking two or three kisses instead of the rent.
4. Supermarket owner did not accept kisses only, so I have given him some other items...........
5. Other expenses 40 kisses

Please don't worry for me, I have a remaining balance of 35 kisses and I hope I can complete the month using this balance. Shall I plan same way for next months, Please Advise!!!

Your Sweet Heart

Diff between a car launch and truck launch



Note: Click on the image to see a bigger version...

Mickey mouse and Ramayana

One day, Mickey Mouse asks Donald Duck to tell him Ramayana. Donald duck is impressed and starts reading verses from Ramayana. Mickey Mouse continues to listen.

After completing the whole Ramayan, Donald Duck lets out a big sigh and asks Mickey Mouse, "Mickey Mouse, tell me...who was the father of Lord Ram?" Mickey Mouse cannot. Angry, Donald duck, again asks, " Mickey Mouse!!! tell me...what was the capital of Ram's kingdom!" Mickey Mouse cannot answer again. Infuriated, Donald Duck kicks Mickey Mouse hard, and MickeyMouse goes and collides with a wall.

As soon as he collides with the wall,he gets up and starts saying verses of Ramayana from start to end.... How did this happen???
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Think Think....
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Ok
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After hitting the wall, Mickey becomes Wall-Mickey(Valmiki, the author of Ramayana)...

Indians

This was a Real incident in New York....

An Indian walks into a New York City bank and asks to see the loan officer. He says he is going to Europe on business for two weeks and Needs to borrow $5,000. The bank officer says the bank will need some kind of security for such a loan, so the man hands over the keys of a new Rolls Royce parked on the street in front of the bank. Everything is checked out, and the bank agrees to accept the car as collateral for the loan. An employee drives the Rolls into the bank’s underground garage and parks it there.

Two weeks later, the man returns, repays the $5,000and the interest, which comes to $15.41. The loan officer says, "We are very happy to have had your business, and this transaction has worked out very nicely, but we are little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you out and found that u are a multimillionaire. What puzzles us is why would you bother to borrow just $5,000?"The Indian replied, “Where else in New York can I park my car for two weeks for 15 bucks?"

"Indians don't do different things but they do things differently." :-)

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

Just Friend Vs Best Friend

A Just Friend says..hi,..hello,..bye,...and walks away...
A Best friend always stop by your side & asks how r u doing ??

A Just Friend has never seen you cry.
A Best friend has shoulders soggy from your tears.

A Just Friend thinks the friendship is over, when you have an argument.
A Best friend knows that it's not a friendship, until after you've had a fight.

A Just Friend hates it when you call, after he has gone to bed.
A Best friend asks you.... why you took so long to call.

A Just Friend, when visiting, acts like a guest.
A Best friend opens your refrigerator and helps himself.

A Just Friend jealous about your romantic history.
A Best friend wonders of your love story.....

A Just Friend expects you to be always there for any help.
A Best friend is always there, wherever you require any help.

A Just Friend doesn't have time in his/her busy schedule,
A Best friend always have time for you in his/her busy schedules....

A Just Friend phones you whenever he/she has some work,
A Best friend calls you often just to hear your voice.....

A Just Friend doesnt have anything to talk to you on phone,
A Best friend doesnt know...what all to finish...

Monday, December 12, 2005

What Girl's Wish

One day, a girl, 16yrs old, heard from her mother that if she will do a regular prayer for 4 yrs, a divine godess (Devi) will come to her dreams & give her 3 boons (Varadaan). So she decided to do it. She completed 4 yrs successfully, doing prayer regularly.

Now it was the day for "Devi" to come. So she slept earlier with thoughts in her mind to ask. And, really a "Devi" comes in her dreams. Now this is the dialogue between them:-

Devi: Oh Girl, you prayed to me regularly for last 4 yrs, so I am very very happy with you. I will fulfill any of your 3 wishes. You can ask anything you like, but there is one condition.
Girl: Condition!, what is that?
Devi: You have a boy-friend?
Girl: Yes.

Devi: When you were doing the prayers, he was waiting for you, so he also sacrificed same as you. Moreover, he didnt know anything about boon and all, so he is also eligible for the boons. So whatever you will ask, he will get 10 times more than that of you. If you agree, then proceed for the 1st boon.

Girl: (After thinking for some time ... ) Yes, I am ready.
Girl: 1st, Make me 10 times richer than the richest person in the world.
Devi: But your boy-friend will be 10 times richer than you.
Girl: It's OK.
Devi: Be as you wish!

Girl: 2nd, Make me 10 times more beautiful than the most beautiful girl in the world.
Devi: But your boy-friend will be 10 times handsome than the most handsome boy in the world.
Girl: It's OK.
Devi: Be as you wish.
Devi: Now the last boon remains.

Girl: O Devi, please give me a MILD HEART-ATTACK.
Devi: What? Are you sure!
Girl: Yes. Very sure!
Devi: Be as you wish.!

Think friends, what happened to her boy-friend? He will get a severe heart-attack & die at once, while the girl remain alive. Thus, the girl will become the world's most beautiful girl and the richest one, too. Moral of the story: So intelligent the girls are! Girls are really more intelligent than we believe about them to be. So be careful boys!

Now, girls please stop reading ... boys continue till the end .....

******
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Dear boys, dont worry, actually what happened is something different than what you all thought! Actually, the girl's boy-friend got a heart-attack, 10 TIMES MILDER than that of the girl. So the boy-friend lived longer than the girl, being world's richest and the most handsome boy.

Moral of the story: Dear boys, the girls are not really that much intelligent than what we believe them to be!

Friday, December 09, 2005

A frustrated victim of spamming!

I want to thank all my friends and family who have forwarded chain letters to me in 2003 & 2004. Because of your kindness:
IMPORTANT NOTE:
If you do not forward this to at least 1200 people in the next 10 seconds, a bird will crap on your head today at 5:30pm.

Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Real Matrimonial Ads

These are actual ads on a matrimony site. Grammar and spell errors have no place in a profile description as everything is straight from the heart!

Disclaimer : I am not responsible if you forget your basic grammar after reading this ...
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Hello To Viewers My Name is Shekhar , I am single i don't have female, If anyone want to Marie to me u can visit to my home. I am not a good education but i working all field in bangalroe.. if u like me u welcome to my heart...when ever u want to meet pls visit my resident or send u letter.. Thanks yours Regards Shekhar *~*
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I want very simple girl. from brahmin educated family from orissa state she is also know about RAMAYAN, GEETA BHAGABATA, and other homework (Homework?)
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Wants a woman who knows me better and can adjust with me forever. she may never create any difficulties in my life or her life by which the entire life can run smoothly. thank you. (The principle of running life smoothly was never so easy!)
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she should be good looking and should have a service. she Should have one brother and one sister. she should be educated. (Hmm... 1 brother 1 sister??)
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I am a happy-go-lucky kind of person. Enjoys every moments of life. I love to make friendship. Because friendship is a first step of love. I am looking for my dreamgirl who will love me more than i. Because i love myself a lot. If u think that is u then why to late come on ........hold my hand forever !!!
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i am simple boy. I have lot of problem in my life because of my luck now. i am looking one gal she care me and love me lot lot lot
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My wife should be as 'Shivani' as in Kahani Ghar Ghar Ki and as Tanwerras in KSBKBT......
(too many serials?!!)
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i want a girl with no drinks if she wants she can wear jeans in house but while stepping out of house she should give respect to our cast (by not wearing jeans?)
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HYE I AM A GOOD LOKING BOY,WHO HAS THE CAPABILITY TO MAKE ANY BODY TO LOUGH. I BELIEVE IN GOD AND ACCORDING TO ME FRIENDS ARE THE REAL MESSENGER OF GOD. THE 2 THINGS I AM LOOKING FROM A GIRL ,THEY ARE 1.THEY MUST BELIEVE IN GOD.2. THEY HAVE TO LIKE MY PROFFESION AND THEY SHOULD NOT GET BORED WITH ME WHEN I WILL TRY TO MAKE THEM LOUGH.(all of us are loughing{laughing})
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whatever she may be but she should feel that she is going to be someone bride and she must think of the future life if she is too like this she would be called the woman of the lamp(what this boy wants??)
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i love my patner i marriage the patner ok i search my patner and i love the patner ok the patner has a graduate ok (The person is suffering from "Ok-syndrome")
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HI I AM VERY COOL NUATHER OK MY HOBBY IS SEE T.V AND NEWS OK I HAVE 1 CAR AND 1 BONWL OK MY MOTHER ALSO GOOD OK MY FARUET WORLD IS OK (the "ok syndrome" again)
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I am pran my family history my two brother two sister and Father & mother sister complity marred (how to get married 'completely'?)
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i am very simpel and hanest. i have three sister one brother and parent. i am doing postal sarvice and tailor master my original resdence at kalahandi diste naw iam staing at rayagada dist. (actually what is this guy doing? Postal service or tailor.??)
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my name is muhamad and i am unmarried. pleaes you marrige me pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes pleaes (height of desperation!)
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I want one girl who love me or my mother. she love me heartly or she havea frank she's skin colour 'normal'not a black or not a whitey. I Think the main think is heart if your heart is beautiful then you are beautiful. but iam not a handsome guy or not a good looking. but my Mom say that I am a good guy. My father already expired . THE CHOICE IS YOUR. bye bye.
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i am kanan. i do owo businas.one sistar. he was marred. (No comments)
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I AM LITTLE FAIR INDIAN COLOUR. I DON'T HAVE ANY HABIT. (maybe the poor guy meant BAD habits)
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hello i am a good charactarised man. i want to run my life happily.i divorced my first wife.her charactor is not good'. i expect the good minded and clean habits girl who may be in the same caste or other caste accepted ... (but credit cards not accepted..???)
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my colour is black,but my heart is white.i like social service (Zebra..???)
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i'm looking out for who lives in bombay, girl simple who trust me lot should be roman catholic, LOVE ME ONLY. (Now that criterion is a must, isn't it?)
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To be married on jan-2006. working woman perferable (Has fixed the marriage date too! But he is yet to find a bride. Wish him best of luck)
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I would like a beautyfull girl. and i do not want her any treasure. because girl is the maharani. (Now she is going to be a lucky girl! Any takers?)

Friday, December 02, 2005

Horoscope 2006 - Part II

Libra:
2006: Libra Overview
With mighty, merry Jupiter in your sign for most of this year, Libra, there's really not much you can't accomplish. All you really have to do is show up! Your luck will be amazing. More often than not, you'll end up in the right place at the perfect time. If your best-laid plans need to be canceled or adjusted during winter, don't be upset about it. By the end of February, you'll see the reason for it all. The full Moon of March 25th will shift your focus from work to your primary relationships. Take care of dear ones -- and know that they'll be happy to return the favor.

The solar eclipse of April 8th could bring about a major change, due to a brand-new attitude -- yours. If you're feeling overwhelmed or excessively burdened, you won't put up with it any longer. The lunar eclipse of the 24th will turn up the thermostat on all your relationships, and could mean you'll be willing to risk becoming a lot more intimate with a certain person. Those feelings will continue throughout May and most of June. Just watch out for a bit of jealousy.

During summer, you may need to invest more time and energy then you feel you've got in your career and your group affiliations. You'll reap the rewards as soon as August, via a public display of gratitude. Whatever you're working on, keep at it, even if authority figures seem to be doing their best to make your job more difficult during September. They may simply be trying to see what you're made of.

A pair of eclipses in your sign during October will make fall very interesting. . If sudden changes come along, take them in stride and be adaptable. The harder you try to resist going along with the universe's plan, the more urgently it will pull you along. Besides, by the time the holidays arrive, you'll be happily involved in family matters, possibly because of a wedding or the birth of a child.

2006: Libra Career
Jupiter likes you this year, and that's good for business. Good luck will flow your way naturally, and if anything doesn't seem absolutely perfect in January, it'll be resolved by the end of the following month. Work will take care of itself for a while starting the last week in March, as the Moon sees to it that you start checking in with your personal life and reestablishing a balance.

Don't look directly at the solar eclipse on April 8th, but do look deeply into your beliefs and attitudes toward your career. The bright light will help you focus on what you need to change in order to move forward at the right pace. The light will go out on the 24th as the lunar eclipse helps you settle back into your comfort zone in the workplace. Your successes in May and June might spark a bit of a competitive frenzy among your peers, but you'll end up ahead.

There ain't no cure for the summertime blues, and this year is no exception. You might feel drained by all the demands placed on you throughout July. At some point in August you'll find a nice point to take a break and might even get some recognition for all your hard work. As autumn approaches, you can expect some conflict with supervisors or maybe an intractably difficult client. Ride it out, but don't give in.

After all of that, you'd like for the fall to be gentle and easygoing. Instead, more eclipses -- in Libra, no less -- make you the star attraction. You'll need to show off how flexible you are as big changes try to sweep you away. If you bend in the wind, you won't break, and you'll ride out the rest of the holiday season in high style.

2006: Libra Romantic
If your New Year gets off to a bit of a slow start in the love department, work on your romantic karma by doing some of your trademark matchmaking. Your perceptiveness and natural knack for connections, along with your subtlety and diplomacy, mean that in January and February you can easily assist those who tend more toward floundering in the realm of romance. They'll thank you, and by March you'll reap some intense rewards. The fabulousness of the weekend of March 25th is practically overwhelming, as you're showered with attention and dishing it right back out to someone wonderful.

Around April 8th, spring blossoms for you, and it's all about relationships -- and it's all up to you. Get clarity surrounding what you truly want, and then all you have to do is communicate to obtain it. The weekend of April 22nd and the following days find you sitting pretty in the realm of romance, perhaps with the perfect someone to share your throne. Things develop at an exponential rate from there, with May and June sprinkled liberally with happy days and increasingly hot nights.

You're not prone to jealousy, but if something offends your sense of fair play in the love arena at summer's outset, you could find yourself suddenly cozy with the green-eyed monster. Don't hold it in; with your natural grace, you can express your feelings (perhaps around mid-July) and come out feeling better and stronger. Your relationship or a potential one will benefit as well, with some sweet results to be found toward the end of August.

If a romantic test comes your way in September, you'll pass with flying colors, and the beginning of October invites fresh, exciting new energy into your love life. Be open and let it in no matter what unusual form it may take, and be ready for almost anything to happen. November offers several days of particular sweetness beginning on the 12th, while your December holidays are happily family-oriented -- and your notion of family may suddenly, beautifully expand. And from December 24th through January 2006, you have a stellar opportunity to examine and reshape the role of love in your life.

Scorpio:
2006: Scorpio Overview
Your own planet, Pluto, will continue on his path through Sagittarius during 2005, putting laws, education and politics at the forefront of everyone's minds -- but yours in particular. You'll be even more likely than usual to get involved this year, but try not to get carried away. Remember, others do have a right to their opinion -- even if they're wrong! Your urge to lecture -- and to go on at length, truth be told -- will be especially strong during January, when several planets in Capricorn will join forces with the new Moon to make it next to impossible for you to keep quiet. The first half of this season will seem to rush by you, but late February and March are times you'll want to remember. Slow down and enjoy this time to its fullest.

The pace of life will pick up dramatically during spring, especially when it comes to relationships. In particular, during April the lunar eclipse of the 24th will illuminate this area of your life, bringing with it the chance to either become closer to your current partner or to find someone new who'll be in your life for some time to come. If you've recently come out of a relationship, go slow.

During summer, your focus will turn to an emotional matter you were sure had long since been resolved. If this issue comes around again, don't be upset. Use the energy of the full Moon of July 21st to talk it all out and get it settled, once and for all. You can reach a happy compromise if you're willing to let go and let the universe drive. The full Moon of September 18th will bring you a chance to become friends with a whole new peer group. Go ahead and get involved. Expand your horizons.

The solar eclipse of October 3rd and the lunar eclipse of the 17th will both affect your subconscious desires. You've always been an expert in that department, but now -- well, now, you'll want more than just physical intimacy. You'll be after true intimacy on all levels, and you won't stop until you have it. That goes double for your encounters with family members around the holidays.

2006: Scorpio Career
January is a big crazy month for you, as Capricorn gets up in your business and creates more new projects than you know what to do with. Fortunately, you'll find that keeping your bosses happy is as easy as smiling, and you'll maintain the good feelings through the rest of the winter. Things will settle down in February, and you'll get into a good groove through the end of March.

You'll feel like shaking things up as spring starts blossoming. You might want to switch workgroups or office mates -- or go nuts and start fishing around for an entirely new job. Whatever happens, it'll be the interpersonal connections that matter most to you. As your ruling planet Pluto makes its pokey way through Sagittarius, you might find yourself drawn toward advanced education.

Expect a blast from the past this summer. You might get an intense feeling of nostalgia around the full Moon on July 21st -- it could be that you start thinking about the path not taken. Take time to think it all out and you'll find a great way to synthesize the passions of youth with today's practical necessities. Collaborations become big news in late September, and you might get involved with a new team.

A quiet lunar eclipse slips under almost everyone's radar on October 17th, but you'll pick up on the deep vibrations and find yourself reenergized. You'll have a new attitude toward your coworkers and will find ways to squeeze extra work out of anyone. Your management style will be well regarded throughout the fall and beyond. The holiday season will give you a chance to recalibrate the balance between your work life and personal life.

2006: Scorpio Romantic
The New Year finds you in a philosophical mode, investigating and questioning anew things you may have accepted or taken for granted for some time. Naturally, you're probing the realm of romance as well -- and in January you're having amazing realizations. There are practically cartoon light bulbs popping on over your head, illuminating your love life in most interesting ways. Share your revelations (especially on the weekend of February 18th) -- and watch as the power of your intellect heats things up (particularly at the end of March).

April brings a little less conversation and a lot more action -- call it the power of spring. Love is in the air and life is all about relationships, and you're well aware of your power to make your fantasies into reality. Don't miss an especially spectacular opportunity to do so around April 24th and again around May 23rd. If you're coupled up, you can transform and reintensify your relationship now -- and if you're single, the world had better watch out.

Some new ideas are brought into your personal romantic arena in early summertime, as well as some inspiring new people. At the same time, an old issue in your love life could revive itself, to your consternation. Don't forget to learn from the experiences of those around you, and don't forget to maintain forward motion. Your natural passion regains momentum the weekend of July 15th -- then your intuition guides you to exactly where you want to be at the beginning of August.

The summer heat sizzles long into fall for you. In mid-September, you're deeply involved in investigating some of the many mysteries of love, while October sees your desires really fired up (and for you, that's saying something). You won't accept anything halfway, nor should you. November 1st looks intense -- take advantage of it. Watch your communication, especially in romance, from November 13th through December 3rd, when Mercury retrogrades through your very own sign; little mix-ups are inevitable, but you can prevent full-blown breakdowns. Get what you want the weekend of December 16th (and don't be surprised if it comes in a strange package).

Sagittarius:
2006: Sagittarius Overview
During 2005, you'll have a chance to cash in on the solid reputation you've created for yourself over past years. You've probably become almost famous in your chosen profession -- so obviously all that hard work was worth it. As soon as January, however, you'll be able to resume your favorite activities: leisure, pleasure and fun. You may be doing it in private, but that won't be a problem. You definitely won't be alone unless you want to be. Money matters may be less than fun to deal with, so be sure you have someone to talk to -- someone you trust. Then let it go, and concentrate on the full Moon of March 25th, which is due to turn up the volume and intensity in your love life.

You may be uncharacteristically concerned with settling down during spring, but don't panic. Remember, you really can have a life and a relationship at the same time. You just have to choose the right partner -- someone who's as freedom-oriented as yourself. An individual who answers that description could be along as soon as May 23rd, by the way, so be ready. Summer's astrological highlights will inspire you to learn some new skills and study subjects you've always been interested in. You're a lifelong student, always at home in a classroom. Make the most of it now. The full Moon of August 19th will inspire you to begin or resume the study of something you really enjoy. By the end of September, you should be up and ready to run.

The eclipses due in October will turn up the electricity in all your friendships, and could herald a change with regard to one in particular. So if someone you've only thought of platonically suddenly makes noises like they're interested in much more from you, think carefully about whether you're ready for this -- and if you can go back to being friends again if it doesn't work out. The holidays look just wonderful. Don't forget to spend some quality time with the elders in your life.

2006: Sagittarius Career
You've taken things pretty far up until this point, so why not take a break? Ease up on the career focus in January. Keep up the good work, but try to reclaim some personal time while you're at it. You might need to take the lead if a financial problem pops up, but otherwise you've got smooth sailing ahead. The full Moon of March 25th signals a return to the hustle and bustle; you won't be able to help yourself as you jump back into the swing of things. You'll feel settled in wherever you are throughout the spring, though it might feel a little weird to not be as restless as usual. Embrace the calm while it lasts! The first week of May will be especially good for you -- you'll feel grounded and really able to tackle any level of work. You're definitely making a name for yourself, probably far beyond the walls of the workplace.

You'll develop an itch for new skills and knowledge as summer rolls around, and it might be a good time to take a class or involve yourself in some pro bono work that expands your horizons. By mid-August at the latest you should know what you want to tackle next and be ready to move toward it full throttle. Business starts picking up dramatically in late September, so be ready to take on more and more work.

As all that work piles up through the fall, you'll need to polish up your work relationships to make sure everyone helps you get it all done. October eclipses will help push you over the edge from friendly to charismatic, so it shouldn't be too hard to keep people happy and attract new business (maybe even poaching from your rivals). The holidays should exceed your expectations and then some!

2006: Sagittarius Romantic
You're in a fabulous mood as the New Year commences, and the whole world's ready to eat you up with a fork and spoon. You're having fun mixing it up a bit in your love life, whether you're single or coupled up; mid-January finds you especially irresistible. Then, with your usual stellar timing, both your creativity and your powers of communication sizzle right around Valentine's Day. The weekend of March 25th heats things up further, with the chance to add your hopes and dreams right into your romantic reality.

While you're certainly susceptible to spring fever, it'll be accompanied by feverish activity in your ever-busy brain. In the love department, this means expanding your explorations and even rethinking some of your ideals. Growth and happiness will result, especially in mid-April. In the days leading up to May 23rd, someone's very interested in learning more about your philosophy of love -- up close and personal. You share generously, as always, whether it's with a tried-and-true sweetie or somebody new.

Summer means incorporating spring's bountiful intellectual activity into your everyday love life, and you're just the person to make it all work out beautifully. You may also be incorporating a new person into your day-to-day schedule, and for your liberty-loving self, this always involves some compromises. A good sense of humor is your best ally, and singles and the coupled up alike enjoy a good laugh (and possibly a good romp) the weekend of July 8th. Then the days surrounding August 6th are fiery indeed.

In September, inspiration for your love life is available right, left and sideways, so get yourself out there -- singles should try an entirely different mode of meeting people for sweet results. Some unexpected admiration takes things to another level in October, so be ready to respond in whatever way you choose. >From November 13th through December 3rd, Mercury's in retrograde, partially in your very own sign -- so caution in romantic communiques is essential. Meanwhile, though, December 1st gives you a stellar chance to spark something new -- or renew something sparkling. The days just before the end of the year are all about you, so celebrate yourself in fine style.

Capricorn:
2006: Capricorn Overview
Your own planet, serious Saturn, will spend the first half of the year influencing you with regard to relationships, Capricorn, and the second urging you to get up close and personal with someone you've just recently learned to trust. But during the whole of 2005, you'll be just as concerned as ever with your career. The good news is that you'll be amply rewarded for your efforts in all departments, and the kudos will start pouring in as soon as the 9th of January. For the rest of winter, you'll focus on your personality and appearance. You may be in the mood to start a diet or quit a bad habit during January. In February, you'll want to tend to money matters -- which may be a bit tricky to navigate. Keep an open mind, and don't hesitate to explore unconventional possibilities. The full Moon of March 25th will bring attention to a family situation -- one you've been worried about for some time. Let go and let your emotions show. The solar eclipse in April will help to bring closure to the matter.

For the rest of spring, you'll be intent on getting closer to someone you've only been thinking of casually for some time now. It's time to put intimacy on the front burner. Whether it's emotional, physical or intellectual doesn't matter. Bare your soul with confidence. In particular, the full Moon of June 22nd will arrive just in time to help you be brave and bold, personally speaking. Take advantage of it.

The urge to get close won't be going anywhere soon, either. All during summer, you'll be focused on a certain person -- but fortunately, they'll be just as focused on you! This could mean -- once again -- that you're due to either end a relationship or take a casual encounter to a whole new level. Just don't let your work slide. You have your reputation to think of. A voice from the past could arrive early in fall. Before you allow them back into your life, be sure you're ready for a committed relationship -- because that's exactly what they'll have in mind. During October, two eclipses will help you to turn toward career matters and think less about personal things. By the time the holidays roll around, you'll be quite ready to relax -- and you'll certainly have earned it. Some new family members may be along to help you enjoy your time together -- but don't forget about that mistletoe!

2006: Capricorn Career
Saturn, your ruling planet, is telling you to brush up on your interpersonal skills this year, but you needn't worry -- you'll get better without trying too hard. Communication skills will be vital in all areas of work throughout the year. Your first lesson will come early (around January 9th), when you'll need to take praise well. You'll start to see the fruits of last year's efforts pay off, and you'll need to keep from getting a swollen ego. Pay attention to budget issues in February and make sure you've wrapped up any office squabbles by the time of the full Moon on March 25th.

Focus on the people you work closest with throughout the spring. It might be your boss, your peers or particular customers -- whoever it is, make sure to devote your attention to their needs. A time will come, probably around the end of June, when you'll need to take a stand for something you believe in that might run counter to workplace culture. Don't worry: You'll have Saturn on your side.

As fall arrives, start to build out from those close relationships until you've got a strong network centered on you. It could be that you find a golden opportunity to cement your reputation as a can-do worker -- seize it and the rest of the year (and maybe the next several years) will go smoothly. You might have the chance to work on a side project that could become quite lucrative over time.

An old employer might come calling in the autumn, or nostalgia might coax you to look them up. If they make an offer that seems tempting, consider it thoroughly before moving; you don't want to end up sliding backward. October's two eclipses will steer your thinking toward the future and where you want to be in several years. Make a plan and stick with it. Once you've made up your mind, the holidays should be surprisingly relaxing.

2006: Capricorn Romantic
Your New Year starts off with a bang indeed -- while you may be seriously chipping away at your list of resolutions in other areas, your reserve is blown away in the love department directly after the first week in January. You surprise the heck out of yourself, and whether you're carousing with somebody new or just anew with your steady, they're pleasantly shocked as well. Then your trademark perseverance in some matter of the heart can pay off the weekend of February 4th -- and the weekend starting March 4th can be whatever you want to make it, lovewise.

Spring's all about relationships. If you're coupled up, you're as protective of your privacy as ever to outsiders, yet you slowly see that letting your true tenderness show is a risk very much worth taking -- perhaps beginning April 1st (no fooling). Similarly, singletons amp up their love lives by getting a little deeper, realizing there's not much to lose and a great deal to gain. May 7th and 8th hold much promise, romantically speaking, and June 22nd is a perfect time to say what you mean and mean what you say.

Your heart continues to occupy your mind through a sizzling summer, with the weekend of July 15th presenting a decision that you're very much ready for. Those who think of you in a businesslike way make some major adjustments at the beginning of August, as your love life takes you through some extremes that you ultimately find thrilling. Who knew you were so wild at heart?

With your innate practicality, you're never one to dwell on your romantic past; but in the fall, someone from your romantic past may be dwelling on you. Your old loyalty may be sparked, but is the connection still there? Let your intuition guide your, especially the weekend of September 16th. In October and November, your mind's on your money and your money's on your mind, but don't exclude the nourishment of a sweet little something in the romance department. Look for a hot holiday party on December 16th or 17th, and as far as New Year's Eve weekend, it's got your name (plus someone else's) written all over it.

Aquarius:
2006: Aquarius Overview
You've been dealing with intensity and passion in all your communications for years now, Aquarius, which means you're probably quite skilled in that department now. Still, as 2005 rolls around, you may find that you're even more prone to speak your mind and let your opinions be known. That goes double for the first nine months of the year, which outgoing Jupiter will spend in easygoing but assertive Libra and your solar house of opinions.

You may be willing to keep quiet for a few weeks, especially after the holidays, so January will be quiet. You'll also need some alone time during this month, especially around the 10th, when a new Moon will inspire you to get to know yourself better. After the 24th of February, you'll need to be careful with money -- in particular, watch out for being taken advantage of by someone. And from the 20th of March on, you won't mince words -- not at all -- when it comes to speaking your mind. Go easy on anyone less well-armed.

That strong-willed trend will continue throughout April, and well past the lunar eclipse of the 24th, when it will be even harder for you to contain yourself. Come May and June, however, you'll be far more sensitive to the needs and feelings of others, and more willing to stifle yourself -- just a touch -- to be sociable. By the end of June, even if you feel swamped by responsibilities and not all that happy about it, you'll keep your nose to the grindstone and your comments to a minimum.

During summer, you'll be more focused on work than on play -- much to the chagrin of your dear ones, who'll be trying to talk you into getting out of town for at least the weekend. Explain to them about how diligent you're feeling, and put off any travel plans until after the 17th of August. At that point, you'll be quite ready for a break in the action. During fall, you may be so ready for a break, in fact, that you'll be looking longingly at your passport. The solar eclipse of the 3rd of October may put you in the mood to travel overseas -- but if you don't have to go alone, don't, and make sure you're home in time to enjoy the holidays with dear ones.

2006: Aquarius Career
The first couple of months of the year will be a time of quiet planning, and you'll need plenty of privacy in order to see things as they really are. Even if you work with people all the time, try to take time for yourself so you can see where you need to go. Fiscal problems might develop in late February, especially if you're not in charge of the budget. Keep a wary eye on people with spending authority. Starting March 20th, you'll want to reinsert yourself into workplace culture with a newfound zeal.

That willpower will grow and grow, and you might surprise yourself and others with your sassy take on work events. Don't be shy about asserting yourself -- if you try to contain your opinions, they'll eat you alive. After the lunar eclipse on April 24th, you'll note an easing of tensions within yourself, and soon you'll be in everyone's good graces again (no matter what happened recently). Toward the end of spring you'll need to stay busy, so much so that you might not notice the change of seasons.

Work is all you'll have time for over the summer, at least until mid-August. Try not to schedule vacation time until then, or you'll end up too preoccupied with missed work opportunities to enjoy yourself much. New projects will go well for you, though they will occasionally reach a hectic pace. You should break records without trying too hard. Restlessness sets in with a vengeance when autumn comes around. You're looking for an escape of some kind, and you might not feel especially choosy. Try not to go overboard completely, or you'll risk a much bigger change than you had anticipated at a time when you'd rather be making slow but steady progress. Education might be the answer to your needs, especially around the holidays.

2006: Aquarius Romantic
After the hectic holidays, you're ready for the New Year your way, and you may want to start by giving yourself some space in the realm of romance. Taking a step back from an existing relationship to look at the big picture isn't a bad idea in January -- and those who are single will be firmly in a 'my way or the highway' mode (a good way to sort efficiently through potential partners). By February 8th, you're electrified by a new vision, whether it's one of reconnecting or starting fresh, and you're electrically attractive as well. Your big heart and grand intentions fuel you at the end of March; just be gentle with anyone you're leaving by the wayside.

Something (or someone) exciting and new comes your way in the days following April 7th, and your charisma is undeniable. You're far from the herd, and other wild cards are easy to pick out (and pick up); if you're coupled up, take your sweetie with you to unusual places. Get into the social swing of things in May and June, when you'll be rewarded with mind- and heart-expanding connections.

The heat of summer might find you slaving away at work instead of enjoying the romantic romps you'd much prefer. Don't get so caught up, however, that you miss the big signals your sweetie or a potential one is sending you -- some progression can occur that's very much to your liking. Schedule hot dates or fabulous getaways around July 21st and August 19th, when your wild appeal is boosted way, way up.

Fall usually gives you that itchy feeling that you'd rather be somewhere else, doing something else or perhaps with someone else, and denying it only makes matters worse. Singles can soar through this season, while couples might plan a great escape together. By Thanksgiving you'll be more grounded, and ready to recognize how thankful you are. Get yourself under the mistletoe the weekend of December 23rd, and prepare for a very happy New Year.

Pisces:
2006: Pisces Overview
As the New Year arrives, Pisces, you'll be quite intent on making a name for yourself within a group situation. You'll do a fine job of it, and you'll be remembered for some time to come for your efforts. During January, you'll be focused on joint financial situations and intimate relationships, all of which will work out quite well as long as you're not afraid to ask for -- and take -- the advice of an elder. The new Moon in your own sign on March 10th will call your attention to your physical self -- and while you in particular should never ignore your emotions, you might want to pay attention to the outer you, just for a while.

During spring, and most especially in April, monetary changes could be en route. Does that mean you'll be pinching pennies? Not at all. In fact, if you're smart about it, you may have more money to spend frivolously than you've had in some time. After the 15th of April, thanks to Venus in steadfast Taurus and your house of communications, you'll be especially persuasive, too. Don't even think about giving up on any argument. You're ready to make constructive changes, and to make them quickly. You go!

Once summer arrives, you can rest assured that you'll be entertained -- and quite amused! At least one new suitor will come your way after the 21st of July -- someone who's as home- and family-oriented as yourself. You'll also be willing to apply yourself completely to getting the job done at work, but with family issues so pleasant, who'd blame you if you were late -- or even absent -- for a few days?

As the year draws to a close, one-on-one relationships will still keep you busy, but with the solar eclipse of October 3rd, and the lunar eclipse of the 17th, you'll shift to money matters -- joint financial issues in particular. If you're not happy with the way your half of the money is being handled, take back control of the checkbook and don't apologize for it. Be careful with finances during the holidays, but do enjoy yourself. 2006: Pisces Career You'll feel unusually assertive as the New Year strikes, and will score major points as you surprise people with your insights and suggestions. Work closely with a supervisor during January to iron out the fine points of the last year's finances and you'll win again. February's full Moon on the 23rd sheds its light on your basic needs -- maybe it's time to ask about that raise?

Watch out for big budget changes in April -- finances will be almost impossible to predict, though the odds are ever so slightly in your favor. Stay prudent until you can see the black ink. You'll gain remarkable powers of persuasion during the last week of the month, so don't worry overmuch about getting your way in meetings or conferences. You'll be inspired to suggest new avenues of business through the spring.

Summer's arrival heralds new colleagues, teammates and customers. Your eagerness to please will be mirrored by their enthusiasm for your company, so you can expect smooth sailing during these sunny months. Your home life should be especially well integrated with your professional life. Toward the end of September, you may wish to withdraw a bit and recalibrate your thinking about your career path.

You'll be able to keep up your smooth patter through the autumn, but check yourself in October. The double whammy of two eclipses presage a time when fine print and fiscal details will be of paramount importance to you. As the year draws to a close, examine all of your agreements with collaborators and clients carefully to make sure you're on the right track. Don't be shy about speaking up if you spot problems, especially before the holidays.

2006: Pisces Romantic
Your list of New Year's resolutions includes something important to you in the love department, and you pursue it with a ferocity that some folks say is quite unlike you. In January, listening closely nets you lots of pertinent information, and after the first week in February you gain an understanding that's invaluable for your love life for the rest of the year. You start a transformation that continues the weekend of February 18th, when you're utterly captivating. The days surrounding March 10th, too, are very favorable for you and whatever romantic antics you're up to.

Your money may be on your mind in mid-April, but don't miss an opportunity to kick off spring romance in style from the 14th to the 16th. Singles fascinate all around them with their allure, while the coupled up captivate their sweeties anew. In mid-May, your selfless assistance of someone else in the love arena benefits your romantic karma in amazing ways. As far as your own affairs, it's time to stop analyzing and go for it -- you'll never know what might have been otherwise.

Summertime brings new suitors for singles and a possible change in status for those already attached. The first weekend in June is excellent for communicating your dreamy feelings and abundance of sentiment, while July 23rd and 24th are all about you (and you're all about love). August 19th and the days after mark the hottest point of your personal summer, so make hay while the sun shines.

Plan some autumnal moongazing and some serious romance around September 17th -- staring deep into each other's eyes is definitely in order. And if you've got someone new in mind -- or something new in mind with your current someone -- there's no time like October 22nd through 24th. Relationships are favored right around Thanksgiving and again toward the end of December, so shine yours up or prepare for the gift of a new one.

Horoscope 2006 - Part I

Aries:
2006: Aries Overview
As the year begins, Aries, your focus will quickly shift from play to work -- hard work. After the 10th of January, in fact, it will be tough to talk you into doing anything other than putting your nose to the grindstone. You'll be able to reach your goals more easily, though, so it will be well worth your time and energy to put everything else aside -- for now, at least. Once March arrives, however, you'll be far more interested in taking care of your health and appearance -- and you'll do a great job of it, too.

A solar eclipse in early April will make this a birthday month to remember, and if you're single, this astral equation could also indicate a new relationship. Keep your eyes open after the 14th of April for someone who's extremely sensual and quite focused -- on you! Be sure they're not too focused, though. You know how you get when you feel smothered.

Summer will be an entirely different story. By July, you'll be enjoying lots of freedom, travel and new experiences. Keep your passport current and your suitcases handy. The full Moon of August 19th will also bring along a chance for you to start a new hobby -- the kind that could put you in touch with someone new, exciting and just fiery enough to keep you interested. Don't pass this one up! Both the hobby and the new person could be exactly what you've been waiting for.

By fall, you may be thinking of making a major career move -- one that's entirely possible. After the 17th of October, you may also be making your way along a whole new relationship path. Either way -- or both ways, perhaps -- you'll enjoy this new start, and so will those who choose to accompany you. The holidays look just wonderful, full of lots of good feelings and lots of surprises under the mistletoe. A new Moon on New Year's Eve will put you in the mood to get back to business after weeks of festivities. Go for it!

2006: Aries Career
There's no need for New Year's resolutions this time around -- you'll be totally driven to get the job done as soon as 2005 kicks in. Friends might have a hard time pulling you away from your job (or your job search, if that's where you're at), but it will all be worth it as you make unbelievably swift progress. The cycle draws to a close on March 4th -- schedule a vacation soon after, or people might start to think you're a robot. Your reputation will actually soar if you take time off.

Lunar madness may strike around your birthday, so be ready for some serious rethinking about your feelings vis-a-vis work and your place in the world. It's an excellent time to jump ship and cast in your lot with a new boss -- or go freelance, if that's your dream. Immediately after Tax Day is the best time to start something new, but you'll do fine at just about any point.

You may have felt somewhat constricted early in the year, but as July rolls around you'll start to stretch out and explore your new territory. Business travel is a definite possibility through the summer, as is a sudden increase in responsibilities. The middle of August will bring you a new opportunity that will be exciting, but not completely unexpected. Jump on it, no matter how happy you are -- the ride will be exhausting but fulfilling, and your resume will suddenly look ten times more appealing to employers.

You might feel like settling into a routine for the autumn, but that's not likely to happen. Your dynamic style will attract attention from on high during the week before Halloween, and you might shift career tracks within the same business or industry. Don't worry -- you'll have plenty of say in the matter. The winter holidays will treat you well, and you should expect a good bonus for the year's efforts. You might feel a little restless and itching for a return to a normal schedule by the end of the year, though.

2006: Aries Romantic
Your personal New Year brings a renewed sense of purpose and lots of high energy after a minor bump on the 13th. Take all those sparks and translate them directly into romance around January 15th. Couples make interesting new sparks now, while singletons can find someone to warm their heart for the rest of the winter. Your perseverance in the love department pays off in a lovely way right around Valentine's Day, with something (or is it someone?) you've longed for landing right in your lap.

A completely stellar weekend's in store for you beginning March 11th, so plan hot dates with new prospects or weekend getaways with your sweetheart. Relationships you begin or reinvest in now have especially high chances of blooming amazingly this spring. But between March 19th and April 12th, Mercury's retrograde in your very own sign, meaning (like everyone else) you'll need to watch your tongue (and email and text messages) with love interests. But what's it mean especially for you? You'll be afforded an unusual opportunity for introspection -- your true inner self and heartfelt desires are revealed, if you just take the time to look within.

From mid-April and through the summer, you can take your love life pretty much anywhere you want it to go. Be bold and you'll be rewarded. Singles who risk a big romantic move around May 5th or 6th can hardly go wrong, and the coupled up can take their relationship to the next level. If you miss this opportunity, your passionate powers of persuasion are on fire again the weekend of June 10th. July promises singles a rollicking good time, while those romantically entangled will enjoy leading their significant (or not-so-significant) other into all sorts of new adventures. And the hot days of August bring hot romance -- particularly right around the middle of the month.

The falling leaves bring a re-evaluation of your romantic path, and that's not at all a bad thing. Mid-September's the right time to either plant deeper emotional roots or pull up and move on; let intuition be your guide. Then someone entirely, spectacularly new can surprise you after October 17th, or you can surprise yourself with fresh inspiration in an existing bond. November's sprinkled with romantic goodies hidden in the burgeoning holiday bustle, and the weekend of December 9th is all about you (and whomever else you choose to include). End the year with your romantic karma in mind -- what you do from December 24th into 2006 will influence your love life dramatically.

Taurus:
2006: Taurus Overview
After months of what feels like treading water, Taurus, you'll be able to make some very definite changes this year -- but you may need to use that world-famous patience of yours for a few months. Winter will be full of interesting changes, especially after January 10th. If you're due to make a career change, wait until then. The best part is that once you set your determined little mind to something, there's just no way you won't have it. So when you decide who and what you want, you have only to focus your considerable energies on it, and you can rest assured that you'll reach all those goals -- and more.

Spring will be fun and sociable, and your worst problem may be deciding which wonderful offer to accept, and which to reject. A relationship could change quite suddenly at the end of April, thanks to the lunar eclipse of the 24th. This bright event will spark up your relationship axis, asking that you turn your attention to one-to-one encounters.

But it's summer that will bring you the most exciting changes. Right up until the very end of July, fiery Mars will keep things passionate, but urge you to keep quiet, too. Once August arrives, however, Mars will take all that passion and aggression into your own sign, turning up the volume on your level of assertion. That means this summer definitely won't go by without you making a stand -- a serious stand -- on behalf of someone or something that you want.

Come fall, you'll make some changes, and they'll all be positive. If they don't feel that way at the time, think about this: There's a silver thread that connects everything that's every happened to us to where we are right now. If you're happy with yourself, you should be grateful for every little thing that's come your way -- whether you thought of it as positive or negative at the time. If there are things you want to change, make new choices and get your new show on the road. 'Tis the season for new beginnings, after all!

2006: Taurus Career
You're a machine early in the year -- take a week or two to get yourself into gear, and then you'll be unstoppable. If you've set your sights on a new job or even a promotion, it should come to you before the ice starts melting. The events that seem like setbacks in the second week of February will quickly turn around and become advantageous. Stay focused and you'll have no serious problems getting where you want to go. The Ides of March should be especially good to you, too.

Springtime is all about cultivating new relationships. Your new status should have people seeking you out, but you might want to go out of your way to attract even more attention. A spot of lunacy around the 24th of April could shake up some long-standing client or colleague relationships, but you'll have a sizable safety net if you play things right. Working on your own or as part of a two-person team will be most rewarding after that.

Mars is all about work, and this summer is all about Mars. June and July will be whisper-quiet as long as you keep your task list up-to-date and your in-box clean, but come August you'll find yourself restless and eager to take on new responsibilities. It could be that you throw yourself into volunteer work, or that you demand a more palatable workload. In either case, you've got the strong red planet backing you up.

You might not like it at first, but the change in weather come September will also bring changes in the way you relate to your career. That doesn't necessarily mean you'll drop everything and write the Great American Novel, but you're definitely in for some serious choices in the months leading up to winter. The very end of October will be the best time to start putting those new plans into action, but take your time. You'll see the start of some very real changes around the holidays.

2006: Taurus Romantic
You're nothing if not patient, and in 2005 your calm, cool and collected style gets rewarded in the realm of romance in just the ways you've been waiting for. Your underlying smoldering sexiness sets something very much on fire around the 22nd of January -- fan the flames by speaking your feelings in a way that seems scary but will have splendid results. Keep the communication coming; you'll need it to ward off a little jealousy (on your part or theirs) at the outset of February.

March 18th marks the beginning of your personal spring; you're a hot number and a perfect package, so don't be afraid to sing your own praises a little. If you do, suitors will flock -- or if you're coupled up, you can take your relationship down a sweet garden path at the end of April. Your combination of rock-steady loyalty and alluring appeal gets recognized big-time; then it's your decision from there.

Summer starts out simmering -- the weekend of June 3rd's already hot to the touch -- and sizzles onward from there. Your passion nearly explodes in mid-July, but your innate caution makes you barely (just barely) keep the lid on it until August, that is. By then, you'll know what you want and you'll know how to get it, and you'll characteristically take a back seat to no one. If anyone tries to play games with you now, they'll be the loser, as you demand all the respect and honesty you deserve.

Autumn's the time to take your love life back to school, learning some lessons (some challenging and some fun, of course) and looking toward the future. The middle of September offers a different perspective on romance that makes a great deal of sense, as well as enlightenment about a partnership (potential or otherwise). As you incorporate your revelations in October, you're able to finally let something go -- and embrace something (or is it someone?) new. Thanksgiving finds you with lots to be thankful for in the realm of romance, and the weekend of December 16th holds gifts for your heart, providing you're not afraid to actively snoop around for them. At New Year's, your love karma's looking very good indeed.

Gemini:
2006: Gemini Overview
As a joint financial matter finally draws to a close in winter, you're finally feeling able to turn your attention toward enjoying life -- and there'll be plenty of opportunities to do just that in February and March. From the 9th through the 15th of January, though, you may need to tie up a few loose ends, but if you can buckle down and do it, you'll reap the rewards of hard work. The full Moon of January 25th will also provide you with the inspiration to keep on going, no matter how hard your work-oriented challenges are -- and to finish up, too! For the rest of the season, you'll be able to relax and enjoy the fruits of your labors.

Your friendships and group connections may change during April, or you may be put in charge of a previously recreational situation -- but you'll just love it. Being in charge will come easily to you during May and June as well, and you'll gain new admirers and lots of new friends who can't believe you're not too good to be true.

Abrupt and sudden changes during summer may not seem to be of the long-term variety when they occur, but if you take a step back and look around, you'll realize that you're really at the beginning of a metamorphosis -- and at the end, you'll be glad for each and every event that contributed to making you 'the new you.' The full Moon of August 19th will give you a chance to express yourself in a whole new way, too. Don't let it go by without taking advantage of it.

During fall, once again, your focus will turn to relationships -- and what to do about them. Money that's owed to you may be repaid, however, and a favor you'd long forgotten about will be returned -- further proof that the good we do comes back to us tenfold. You'll also have the chance to make some extra cash and have some fun, too, so if a hobby suddenly turns into a part-time job around the holidays, make time for it.

2006: Gemini Career
If you can push yourself hard through January, the rest of the winter will be a snap. Close out any pressing financial issues as early as possible -- definitely by the 15th. It won't be the easiest time you've ever had on the job, but the rewards will be worth it. The 25th of January brings a full Moon and eleventh-hour inspiration; you should be able to push the rest of your big deals through by the end of that week at the latest and enjoy a few months of comparative relaxation.

Leadership will be important through the spring. April might bring a transfer -- probably not across the globe, but definitely bringing new responsibilities. It might seem almost silly to be in charge at first, but you'll find that it grows on you as you gain confidence quickly. Those working most closely with you will appreciate your new style.

Change is good, right? If you're down with that, then you'll love the summer. You might be lucky enough to be party to an industry-wide paradigm shift; on the other hand, you might just see yourself take a sharp left turn careerwise and end up somewhere you'd never have expected. July 21st brings a time of radical new ideas -- follow them up diligently and you'll be exactly where you're supposed to be.

Your flair for wit and charm will serve you well in the fall, as you'll need to acquire new contacts and massage old ones to keep ahead of the game. Financial problems will work themselves out as if by magic, and you might find a way to make money from an unexpected source. Someone from your past will contact you in the second week of November, possibly seeking a recommendation or renewed partnership. Follow up on the opportunity and continue working on other alternate revenue sources through the holidays.

2006: Gemini Romantic
Your New Year begins with you all over the place in the realm of romance, with the kinds of ups and downs that make other people crazy but actually manage to keep your interest high. Be prepared to make a decision about your love life in mid-January, though; keeping a particular option open is no longer, well, an option. After some brief but informative deep thoughts at the outset of February, you enjoy the many sweet treats the rest of the winter sets out for you with your trademark wit and liveliness.

Mercury goes retrograde for almost a month beginning March 19th, which may bring misunderstandings worthy of a romantic comedy into your life, but with your quick thinking you can turn potential crises into sudden kisses. But you should also look beyond the physical to deeper aspects of people now -- including yourself. You get special access to this new level at the end of March and beginning of April, and your powerful intellect sees how sexy it can be. May and June find you in charge, with your sweetheart or any number of potential ones following along happily.

Matters of the heart require your focus the first weekend of July, rewarding you with the kinds of conversations and flirtations that have you practically falling in love every other minute. You'll enjoy summer's rapid-fire romantic activity, with something new always on the horizon, whether you're single or conducting a raging romance. Even a little oddness in August just adds more color to the overall picture. As for the weekend of August 26th -- well, watch out, world, here you come.

Come autumn, your bewitching variety of talents ensnares you in something that could be serious -- if you let it be. The 10th and 11th of September offer insight to help you decide. It's spooky how sexy you are on Halloween, and the attention you get may even be (almost!) too much for you. But beware of another Mercury retrograde from November 13th to December 3rd -- say what you mean and mean what you say. Then get yourself under the mistletoe the weekend of December 23rd and kiss the year good-bye -- and someone sweet hello.

Cancer:
2006: Cancer Overview
You're going to be very busy for the first few weeks of the New Year, Cancer -- but rewards will come along before you know it. Keep your goals in sight, and don't quit. All during winter, you'll feel the need to expand your horizons, either through travel, moving or connecting with like-minded others. Basically, the universe is giving you the chance to break out of your rut and learn something new. Take advantage of it. Sign up for classes or attend a seminar around the 21st of January.

Spring looks to be quite the hard working season for you, starting as soon as the solar eclipse on the 8th of April. This energizing event will affect your career and public reputation, urging you to take professional matters into your own hands. Just be sure not to ignore your family or partner while you're climbing the corporate ladder. The lunar eclipse on the 24th will shed its light on your friendships and group relationships. At that time, you may be asked to take more responsibility and prove your leadership abilities -- and you'll do a fine job. During May and June, a bit of intrigue may enter your life. Be careful not to become involved in anything that's not completely on the up-and-up.

Once summer rolls around, your focus will shift to your appearance -- possibly because there's someone new in your life who's inspiring you. You'll be tempted to spend more than you know you should once August 17th arrives. If you have to make a major purchase, shop around carefully.

Career and family will once again keep you busy during fall, especially around the 3rd and the 17th of October, when a pair of eclipses will activate these areas of your life. If you've been thinking of making a new career start, this would be a fine time to do it. By the end of November, you should be settled in comfortably -- like you'd been there all along. Money matters may be tight during the holiday season, but don't panic. You'll enjoy the season more if you concentrate on warm feelings, comfort food (your specialty) and mistletoe.

2006: Cancer Career
The New Year starts with a whirlwind of activity that should keep you too busy to think very far ahead, but the bluster won't last too long. By the 21st of January, you should be able to take a breather -- it's a good time to develop new skills or improve old ones. Throughout the winter, you'll feel a vague restlessness that will move you to consider new career options. You won't be tempted to chuck it all away, but you'll definitely want to make a move of some kind.

Spring will present challenges, but you'll be able to meet every one. The solar eclipse of April 8th will change the way your coworkers and supervisors see you -- so get to work beforehand to make sure that the change is in your favor. Keeping a balance between your personal life and your career track might be tough. Leadership becomes an issue on the last week of the month, so make sure you step up and show what you've got. Workplace struggles simmer through May and June -- try to keep above the fray if at all possible.

Your reputation will continue to be important through the summer, especially if you have new clients or bosses to worry about. Don't let them keep you from your responsibilities, though. Toward the end of August, a series of financial mini-crises will come and go; in each case, sensible spending will be the key.

October will see you thinking much more seriously about big career moves. The 17th is a time of big change for you in one way or another, but you'll absorb it quickly. By the time Thanksgiving rolls around, you should be used to your new scene and ready for the holiday rush. Put off any fiscal issues until the New Year, if possible -- they shouldn't be too urgent for the time being.

2006: Cancer Romantic
If your love life at the end of 2004 was a little too snug even for cozy you, prepare to change things up for the better. If you're coupled up, caring may have shifted to feeling a little confined; if you're single, the winter doldrums may have left you uninspired. The New Year's your wake-up call; boldly reenvision your love life now, then set about making it happen with your usual tenacity. January 22nd through the 29th is an excellent time to begin, and February 19th and the week that follows are all about expanding romantic horizons.

Speaking of expanding, your trademark generosity increases exponentially in March; just make sure anyone who's enjoying your lovely nurturing is worthy. Your sentimental nature requires much consideration, and you won't accept being taken for granted now (or ever, really). As other's thoughts turn with spring to love, you may become deeply involved in work. It'll prove rewarding, but take time out (especially in mid-April) for your love life. And take time out to deal with indecision surrounding a relationship or a potential one around May 19th; given a little space, your heart will tell you what to do, loud and clear.

Passion in June could rock your world, with the weekend of June 17th bringing an unusual intensity -- but wait to interpret your wild emotional responses further before committing to anything long-term. July kicks off with the cosmos smiling directly on you; you'll charm the socks off anyone you choose, and social events seem made for you to be the centerpiece. And with your high energy at the end of August, you can initiate something very sweet, whether it's with your longtime love or someone brand-new.

With the onset of autumn, you realize your personal philosophy of love needs updating to incorporate some new understanding. The weekend of September 16th is the perfect time to listen to your inner voice and explore the unknown -- whether it's unknown ideas or unknown people. Family matters are highlighted in the first half of October, and how you define your family may even change. Thanksgiving may find you busily making romantic plans along with a lovely dinner, and your December holidays are merry, bright and generally gorgeous, especially in the arena of love.

Leo:
2006: Leo Overview
As the year begins, you may feel torn between putting in more time at work and giving yourself some quality time alone. You can find the right balance if you manage your time wisely, and if you remember to 'measure twice and cut once.' Do it right the first time. During February, your primary relationship will keep you busy. If you're not attached as the season begins, get yourself out there and look around. The new Moon of the 8th could bring someone along who's just different and unusual enough to keep you interested.

During spring, an urge to learn something new will tempt you into taking classes or taking off for parts unknown with your partner. A proposal or a lovely invitation could come your way after the 23rd of May, too. Be prepared to make some changes for nothing but the most delightful of reasons.

Summer will be a fun, sociable season for you -- but expect some delays while traveling or attempting to keep your appointments between July 23rd and August 16th, when communicative, travel-loving Mercury will throw his engine into reverse -- in your own sign. During this time, always have a Plan B ready to go, and expect everything to take longer than you'd anticipated. This doesn't mean you won't enjoy yourself. In fact, you'll probably meet someone you never would have crossed paths with if you'd been where you were supposed to be.

Your natural talent for charming chitchat will be even more lethal during October. You may even be able to have a positive impact on a tough family situation. Take advantage of the good, warm feelings the holiday season inspires, and see if you can't remind loved ones of the importance of staying close. You may have some extra work heaped on your plate during mid-November, but it's nothing you can't handle. Travel plans will come together nicely during December, so make your arrangements and rest assured that all will be well.

2006: Leo Career
Your job might feel just a touch too demanding as the New Year starts. Cultivate efficiency and you'll have plenty of time for other pursuits, but expect to stay busy until at least February 8th. At that point you might find a new job opening or project interesting enough to take you away from your routine. March, especially, will be a time of transition.

Spring is all about new opportunities and directions. If you freelance, expect a new client that brings a different set of expectations. If you're on the clock, you'll see a creeping change in the way you relate to your industry. The last week in May will bring an offer or promotion that might be too good to pass up.

After all that change, summer will come as something of a relief to you -- slow and steady as she goes. In fact, from late July through mid-August, things will slow down so precipitously that you might stall out, especially if you work with communications, computers or education. You'll do well to have another project ready to move forward, preferably one on which progress can be made slowly.

October will pose a set of interesting problems for you, but each one can be settled without stretching too far from your normal mode. There might be tensions simmering in the workplace, but you won't have to get involved with any of that ugliness. November will be busy, especially mid-month, but you'll actually be glad to have the distraction. The holiday season will go well for you, but might be over too soon.

2006: Leo Romantic
Make time for some you-time as you kick off your brand-new year. The demands on your time are many, and a little maintenance on the ol' heart by way of some peace and quiet will stand you in good stead. Start your Valentine's festivities early on February 11th; you can sweep anyone off their feet, regardless of whether it's your longtime sweetheart or someone brand-new. March 15th may find you uncharacteristically indecisive about some matter of the heart. Give it a few days and your intuition will kick in; then you'll create some fabulous excitement around the 21st.

Spring brings the reawakening of love (or is that lust?) and the blooming of everything around you, which always makes you want to roar. However, the 11th of April begins a week in which singles on the prowl might want to tone it down a little, while long-term relationships go suddenly from a state of hibernation to spring fever. Look for more action in your love life from May 23rd to 25th, when your generous spirit is rewarded very sweetly indeed -- perhaps you're the one being swept off your feet now.

For a good time in June, you need look no further than the weekend of the 10th, when your always indisputable magnificence is virtually blinding. Issue sunglasses to your crowd of admirers, then see which one looks best in your lovely glow. If you're coupled up, let your intuition guide you around July 5th; after the fireworks fade, you can spark something special indeed. From July 23rd through August 16th, you'll want to be extra-super-cautious in communications with those you're romancing, as Mercury's in retrograde in your very own sign. Handle the inevitable mix-ups by dishing out some of your trademark generosity.

The very beginning of September's got your name written on it, so take that first weekend and have your way with it. The 10th and 11th, too, have you-plus-romance all over them. October finds your natural charm turned way, way up; the coupled up can enjoy some extra autumnal coziness, while singletons can attract someone as loving and loyal as they themselves. Holiday socializing heats up in mid-November, with you as always at the center of every party (holding the mistletoe over your own head, of course). Plan a getaway in December; it'll be romantic, whether you're traveling with your sweetie or going solo.

Virgo:
2006: Virgo Overview
You'll probably find the first half of 2005 to be quite different from the second, Virgo. During winter and spring, you'll be thinking over money matters, and trying to get things settled. In summer and fall, you may feel the need to hibernate for a while to get your energy level back to where it was before all the excitement started -- and these seasons will be exciting, for several reasons.

Still, you'll have nothing but success when it comes to finances, especially if you're working with a partner. Jupiter, the benevolent king of the gods, will spend most of the year helping you to make sound financial decisions and choose the right partners. Listen carefully to the advice of elders around the end of January. A relationship will heat up and turn quite passionate around the end of February -- and it will stay that way through March.

A pair of eclipses during April will get your spring off to an amazing start -- especially when it comes to intimate matters and joint finances. Someone from out of town may also make a rather stunning entrance into your life. Tend to your career responsibilities during May and June, and expect to be rewarded by authority figures as early as June 4th. Secrets and whispers will be on the agenda at the end of June, so expect to be spending some time behind closed doors -- but not necessarily alone.

Summer will arrive with the chance to join forces with a whole new group, either for spiritual or metaphysical reasons. You'll get an awful lot out of their company and their influence, so don't hesitate to get totally involved. Your birthday will be extra fun this year, thanks to a new Moon and a full Moon, bringing along surprises and lots of fast-paced change.

If you're in need of the advice of a professional during fall, rest assured that you'll find someone who can help during October or November. Look around carefully, do your homework and be sure to investigate all your options before you sign on the dotted line. Expect long-distance friends and family to come along during the holidays, making them especially merry. Enjoy!

2006: Virgo Career
You might fret and worry, but money won't be a problem for you this year. Work closely with supervisors or long-term clients through January and you'll meet all your milestones with ease. Work starts to get exciting in February as Jupiter enters the picture, and you'll find plenty to keep yourself occupied through the end of March.

April brings two eclipses that will mark a close to the latest round of financial struggles. You might also find it a good time to ask about raises and promotions. Toward the end of the month, you might make a valuable connection with someone outside your industry. Big rewards start to roll in for you, starting in early June. By the end of the month, you could find yourself stuck in the middle of a workplace battle, but make sure to give as good as you get.

As the summer slides into focus, you might feel drawn to new volunteer work, or perhaps even a shift in focus for your career as a whole thanks to a wider view of the world. New people in your life might pull you in different directions. The Moon will take an interest in you during late August and September, and probably will step on the accelerator a little as you go through some new and exciting changes.

It might be beneficial for you to seek the advice of a career counselor or coach in the autumn. Friends mean well, but they're inevitably biased. Your work and/or job search will progress smoothly, but will lack the zing that the early part of the year gave you. There might be a nice holiday surprise waiting for you at the end of this long year.

2006: Virgo Romantic
With the brand-spanking New Year, your urge to find a place for everything and get everything in its place kicks in, especially as you think about realizing your sweet little romantic resolutions. But you're also well aware that love often refuses to fit into tidy niches, preferring to act gorgeously unruly and surprise you when you least expect it. The end of January and the beginning of February are the perfect time to delve deeper into your personal romantic philosophy -- and to realize giving up a little control and keeping your expectations flexible can bring unexpectedly fabulous results.

Watch for someone who perceives your bountiful passion through your external reserve around February 23rd -- and watch for things to progress beautifully for the next month. Those already coupled up may find their relationship rather suddenly at an entirely new level. Watch what you say, and double-check email and text message from mid-March to mid-April as your ruling planet, Mercury, goes retrograde, bringing the possibility of your love interest misunderstanding you entirely. But spring showers you with more romance, with April a month of hearts and flowers.

June may bring the kind of affair that has your usually level head up in the clouds -- but do keep your practical feet on the ground, as things may not be quite what they seem. The first weekend in July offers clarity (if you're keeping your eyes and your heart open). The rest of summer gives you opportunities in the realm of romance you can really sink your teeth into -- the juicy kind that please both your emotional side and your intellect.

The weekend of September 2nd gets autumn off to a fun and flirtatious start, with both your wit and charm nearly off the charts -- and for you, that's saying something. Watch for more of the same on September 30 and the following days. October or November finds you in your trademark caregiving mode, but you'll want to make sure the recipient is absolutely worthy of your attentions before moving forward. At Thanksgiving, you're thanking your lucky romantic stars for where you are now, and the December holidays bring new sparkling joy to your heart.

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