AUDI
Always Unsafe Designs Implemented
BMW
Big Money Works
Bought My Wife
Brutal Money Waster
Bimbette Motor Weapon
Break My Window
BUICK
Big Ugly Indestructible Car Killer
CHEVROLET
Can Hear Every Valve Rap On Long Extended Trips
Cheap, Hardly Efficient, Virtually Runs On Luck Every Time
Cheap Heap, Every Valve Rattles, Oil Leaks Every Time
Condition Hopeless, Entire Vehicle Relies On Leftover Engine Technology
DODGE
Drips Oil, Drops Grease Everywhere
Dem Old Dudes Go Everywhere
Dead or Dying Gas Eater
Dear Old Dad's Geriatric Express
FIAT
Failure in Italian Automotive Technology
Fix It All the Time
Fix it again, Tony!
FORD
First On Recall Day
First On Race Day
First On Rust and Deterioration
Fix Or Repair Daily
Found On Road, Dead
Fault Of R & D
Fast Only Rolling Downhill
Features O.J. and Ron's DNA
Found On Russian Dump
GM
General Maintenance
Great Mistake
GMC
Garage Man's Companion
Got A Mechanic Coming?
HONDA
Had One Never Did Again
HYUNDAI
Hope You Understand Nothing's Drivable And Inexpensive...
MAZDA
Most Always Zipping Dangerously Along
OLDSMOBILE
Old Ladies Driving Slowly Make Others Behind Infuriatingly Late Everywhere
Overpriced, Leisurely Driven Sedan Made Of Buick's Irregular Leftover
Equipment
PINTO
Put in new transmission often
PONTIAC
Poor old Neanderthal thinks its a Cadillac
SAAB
Send Another Automobile Back
Swedish Automobiles Always Breakdown
Sorry Assed Auto Builders
TOYOTA
Too Often Yankees Overprice This Auto
VOLVO
Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object
Vehicles Of Low Velocity Owners
VW
Virtually Worthless
